what is the loss
here? father, you were 
a ghost in our lifetime –
living poltergeist, black demon,
haunting your children
even in broad daylight.
we knew you by your drunk stupor,
by your furious, inebriated banging
of doors and roars. we knew you
by your silence, floating
through our lives, absent
if not for our fights.

you are dead now,
body in a casket,
we see you clearly more than ever.
the minister gives a eulogy –
a standard textbook answer.
how could this be you?
but then we catch the wisp
of a memory: a day at the beach,
a graduation ceremony, your last smile,
and we tear.

the casket seals shut and
we send you off: the ghost has turned to ashes.
we sob, this loss is too great to bear –
father, you were a ghost
in our lifetime, but now
you’re really gone.